Monday, January 23, 2012
Zombicross is a series of survival lanes and dilemmas. Each represents a challenge humans might face in a disaster. We use the Zombie Apocalypse because it’s a fun way to train for a real life problem.
Survival lanes test your stamina, strength and decision making ability while under simulated stress. Lanes vary in intensity depending on your Heat selection, local terrain and the type of venue.
Not all lanes are at all venues and not all lanes are described below. Consider this a sample.
1. Lost in the Woods: This is the longest survival lane and is typically between ½ and 3 miles of running. Lost in the woods simulates a prolonged escape on foot from the epicenter of the Zombie outbreak. The course is challenging, full of zombies and puts the hurt on you before you get into the survival lanes course to finish the escape from Z City. You can skip this portion if you are not in an “Elite” heat. We are eliminating the “I am too out of shape excuse” for you.
2. Picket Fence: short walls simulating front yard fences, concrete barriers or piles of undead hordes about to be reanimated.
3. Back Yard Fence: walls simulating back yard and security fences.
4. Grocery Shopping: a zombie and shopping cart infested aisle in a supermarket. Get that can of tuna or your group of survivors dies of starvation!
5. Mostly Closed Garage Door: low hanging barriers requiring you and your team to squeeze under while the zombies approach. Hope you all make it.
6. Blind Faith: What’s behind door number 2? A bunch of zombies. Bad choice.
7. Sewer Escape: Culverts full of horrible stuff. Blood, mud, limbs…whatever. Zombies wait at the exit so stay low on the way out.
8. Clogged Road: cars parked on the road impede your progress as zombies slowly pursue you from all directions.
9. Doggy Door: a small opening you or your team has to fit thru as the zombies slowly approach.
10. Random Bad Stuff: whatever the venue has to offer. Ditches, downed trees, bleachers, rabid dogs, angry chickens, etc.
11. Balance or Die: narrow, elevated ramps. Fall off and the zombies see you. Once they see you they want to eat those brains you’re hiding.
12. Rope Drag: Ever drag your buddy out of danger with a rope?
13. Self Rope Drag: See number 12. Only you’re dragging yourself.
14. Fire Escape: A ladder is a few feet off the ground. Can you get your feet high enough to climb to safety? This is harder than it sounds.
15. Bloody Ground: super slippery Zombie nastiness makes you wish for cleats. You’ll also wish for a fire hose and a bucket of hand sanitizer.
16. Commando Crawl: I have no idea when you would encounter this in a real-life situation but it’s too fun to leave out.
17. Container Pain: Cargo containers to climb over. If the doors open before you do it’s a Zombie feeding frenzy.
Dilemma: A problem with two possible solutions and both solutions suck.
1. Sand Bag Baby: you find a small, extremely heavy kid made of sand. Do you pick him up or leave him for the Zombies?
2. Busted Leg: one of your teammates has a broken leg, punctured lung or spinal explosion. Do you leave her to the Zombies (she’ll chase you like a woman scorned) or carry her over the obstacle?
3. Obstacle Escape: You can’t climb over a wall and the Zombies are on your tail. Good thing there’s a bloody ice-bath you can take instead.
4. Gut Shot: you don’t finish an obstacle. Your whole team gets a pass if the captain takes a paintball to the stomach.
5. Ladies Delight: Run the course in a speed-o and get a free Zombicross T-Shirt. Trust us. Everyone loses.
Thursday, January 19, 2012
It’s unlikely you’ll be in a secure bunker when the Zombie Apocalypse begins.
ZPoc Survivors will be a mix of the fit and the lucky. Eventually luck runs out and only the fit will be left to crush the zombie hordes and repopulate the Earth.
Your house is three miles and a thousand zombies away. The roads are clogged with disabled cars. You're going to have to make it on foot.
Are you fit enough to make it? Can you run, jump, lift, shuffle, crawl and climb to save your bacon?
Will you make good decisions under physical duress?
Do you have the strength to rescue that 12 pack of Shiner in the office fridge?
These questions are best answered before you’re neck deep in the undead.
Boom! Blood, sweat and beer are all that stand between you and a horrible fate as a soulless Zombie roaming the Earth.
Tough as a Chuck Norris, John Wayne and Jean Claude Van Damme hybrid? Go it alone.
Need some help? Form a team to save humanity (or use your slow friends as bait. We’re cool with it if you are.).
Love the taste of human brains? Volunteer as a Zombie.
Obviously preparedness plays a roll. Your chances of survival improve if you have a Bug Out Bag and a weapons cache with you at all times. However, 5,000 rounds of ammo won’t save you if you can’t peel an orange without breaking a sweat.
The photo is from the OC Throw Down. If she’s with you on ZDay you’re good to go.
Wednesday, January 18, 2012
We are building a Zombie Apocalypse Obstacle Course near San Marcos, Texas in short order and need zombies. Lots of them.
Wednesday, January 4, 2012
Santa Anna's dragoons are back from the grave and looking for revenge. In order to warn Texas of the lumbering invasion you must survive a throng of apocalyptic obstacles, escape the hungry zombies and protect their sandbag baby.
To escape our humans only have to navigate a half mile gauntlet of hell. Unfortunately for them the course is littered with debris they must negotiate while being chased by zombies.
We have limited space on the grounds so we pack a ton of obstacles into each lane to make sure you get the most bang for your buck. There are water obstacles; however, we have "passing lanes" around them so you do not have to get wet if you plan on partying until 2 in the morning.
Athletes can enter the course as many times as they want in their heat time (one hour)...if you want to go in again after your heat is over that's okay, too. Just use what brains the Zombies don't eat to be courteous of others.
The course is challenging but it is pretty short so athletes of all fitness levels can participate. We also offer "passing lanes" so you can bypass obstacles that are too difficult.
Human or Zombie?
You can register as either. The choice is yours. If you are very fit or very unfit you may want to be a Zombie.
Register today...or the Zombies Win.